In the enneagram system, each number, or type, has a core fear and desire. However, what they generally do not have is a sense of really inhabiting themselvesa strong sense of their own identity. Contrast this with Sixes, who try to maintain their inner peace by constantly looking out for any potential vectors of danger and guarding themselves against them. While knowing someones enneagram cannot instantly make you closer or give you all of the answers, it can help you learn and understand their motivations a bit better. Nines must resist the urge to escape into premature Buddhahood or the white light of the Divine and away from the mundane world. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance". People with an Enneagram Type 5 personality tend to be curious, independent, and observant in their behavior. This sensitivity will make them wiser and more relaxed with themselves. Type 9 Strengths. Purechat uses this cookie to send data to purechat.com, to connect visitors to the reservation team and track visitors to stay on portal. All Enneagram material used with the kind permission of Don Riso, Russ Hudson and the Enneagram Institute. The emotional drive of type 9 is called sloth which refers to a sense of inertia or laziness particularly with regard to yourself and your priorities or agenda. The Enneagram Type 9, " The Peacemaker, " is a patient and understanding partner who seeks to truly understand their significant other and create a loving and harmonious relationship. The love of Nines is quite selfless, unintrusive and accommodating: You can be yourself around them without them asking for much in return. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. Nines are open-minded and rarely nurture prejudices. Stubborn, fatalistic, and resigned, as if nothing could be done to change anything. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads. Here are, It's Black History Month, and were highlighting trailblazing Black women who use their innate gifts to remind us w, When a relationship ends, it can be hard to let go and move forward, especially for INFPs. A Type Nine who is able to express his needs and wants to other people is a Type Nine who has experienced growth. Enneagram Type 9 people are characterized by the following strengths: Nines are calm and adaptable. They don't realize it's not love if you're not gonna stick with your significant other through thick and thin. I think 9's become very selfish and inconsiderate of others when it comes to keeping their own internal peace. Level 7:Can be highly repressed, undeveloped, and ineffectual. In the beginning they read like sidekicks or emotional sponges - I didn't really understand the motivations and fears. Loyalty is deeply important to me. Ease: When a Peacemaker brings relaxation, everyday living becomes smoother and easier. In disintegration, they can procrastinate and become lazy or indecisive. If they do start to act passive-aggressively toward each other, they need to focus on clear and honest communication. They want a partner who is supportive and who actually listens to them when they speak. That's why I want you to get to listen to thisimportant podcast episode. 9's stay as long as the relationship isn't disturbing their precious peace. Also I start fantasizing about other people when I get scared I realize. Nines are usually very laid-back individuals who enjoy their downtime. Needs to be patient with recovery work and release judging.Type 2 - Needs to realize falling in love can happen when you least expect it. Unhealthy sacks of shit cheat, doesn't have anything to do with an Enneagram number. Learn more about the arrows. Do not want to be affected, so become unresponsive and complacent, walking away from problems, and "sweeping them under the rug." Type 9 is located in the 891 triad which is often described as the gut or body-based center. In Enneagram language . When both types feel overwhelmed and exhausted by the feelings of the Four or the steady practicality of the Nine, they will need tools for effective communication. It was somewhat relieving to see this post, honestly. Learning someones flirting and dating style can help avoid certain miscommunications, especially towards someone you truly want to grow closer to. Fives like to think inductive: From small pieces of fact to a unifying theory. Generally corresponds to the Schizoid and Dependent personality disorders. The cookie is used to store and identify a users' unique session ID for the purpose of managing user session on the website. These types are characterized by a unique combination of strengths, weaknesses, unconscious motivations, fears and triggers that shape their thoughts, feelings, and actions. Their Nine wing softens their intensity and makes them better at mediating instead of simply getting their will, but their main drive still comes from this desire to protect themselves through domination. When their dreams for the relationship collide, they need to process logically and without withdrawing into their inner world and may need specific tools to improve communication. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. Experimente a CP Online em portugus. They are typically spiritual seekers who have a great yearning for connection with the cosmos, as well as with other people. The healing and the dealing with the story of the affair is soooo important to a couple's journey forward together if they decide to pursue the marriage and they often get a resurrected marriage that is healthier than even before the affair as a result.In this very special podcast episode, we are truly honored with one of the world's leading couples experts, Dr. Alexandra Solomon to guide us. There are several ways to interpret what the gut or body types represent. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. Both types are focused on others, putting the needs of others before their own and making sure people feel loved and safe. But what theyre trying to avoid are different things, which is why they use different strategies to do so. Which do you relate to the most? Both of these body types give of themselves physically to others, often living with minimal attention to themselves. The feelings you have for others endow you with much of your identity and self-esteem. The thought of cheating on my significant other makes me want to vomit and cry all at once. Enneagram Type Nine: The Ultimate Guide CP Enneagram Academy Did you purchase the Masterclass during Black Friday weekend? The pattern element in the name contains the unique identity number of the account or website it relates to. Be sure to remember that, and don't minimize the downsides. A lot has been written about the difference between the two types. Enneagram type 9s are amiable, open-minded, optimistic, nonjudgmental, supportive, and peaceful when at their best and living in healthy levels. Meanwhile, the Twos thoughtful inclusion allows the Nine to show up bigger and to be seen and heralded as special. Their response is to throw themselves into activity and (almost) constant (over)stimulation. Truity offers a free personality test based on Myers and Briggs' types, but does not offer the official MBTI assessment. The Enneagram is an emotionally focused system of understanding people honing in on one's core emotional motivations and fears. Watch my video here: Paradoxically, at one with self, and thus able to form more profound relationships. The nine enneagram numbers represent nine distinct personality types. YouTube sets this cookie via embedded youtube-videos and registers anonymous statistical data. This couple likely enjoys spending a lot of time together and doesnt tire of each other easily. This cookie is native to PHP applications. Lack of physical activity. What are some enneagram 9 careers and what is the Enneagram 9 in love . Each number (1-9) is uniquely connected to other numbers and also distinctive because of the different fears and desires of each type. But their differences begin to show very clearly in how they go about achieving this. The Enneagram personality test. Questions are forced-choice, similar to the method used by the Riso-Hudson Enneagram Type Indictor (RHETI). Level 6:Begin to minimize problems, to appease others and to have "peace at any price." And with more accessibility to infidelity than ever before, our culture is caught up in the aftermath of what to do about it if and when it happens in a couples life together as well as how to prevent it.And though each narrative is different, we heal together. Now I love them and probably wouldn't be here if not for them. The Easygoing, Self-Effacing Type: Receptive and reassuring but can be agreeable and complacent. The Enneagram is a system of personality which describes people in terms of nine types, each with their own motivations, fears, and internal dynamics. Common jobs many nines will choose involve stability, repetitive patterns, and an easy going pace. Enneagram Type Preference Test This test produces a scored list of all nine types. Essentially we are all Nine Enneagram Types, you may want to implement other Type's suggestions as well as doing your own. Living Through. I would have felt terrible cheating because I knew that would have hurt my partner, but that didn't mean I wasn't interested in having sexual experiences with other women. Solar Flare versus Panda Bear. Nines get excited about their free time. I put in a lot of effort into making sure things are done correctly and . Twos on the other hand are very conscious of their feelings. Force yourself to pay attention to what is going on. When the Type Nine is in a relationship with a Type Four, the couple exemplifies the idealistic nature of the Four and the practical, relaxed qualities of the Nine. Both can struggle with procrastination, be detached from the real world and, on a more positive note . Examples:Queen Elizabeth II, Princess Grace of Monaco, Claude Monet, Norman Rockwell, Abraham Lincoln, Dwight D. Eisenhower, Gerald Ford, Ronald Reagan, George W. Bush, John F. Kennedy, Jr., General Colin Powell, Walter Cronkite, Carl Jung, Carl Rogers, Joseph Campbell, Walt Disney, Jim Henson (Muppets), Garrison Keillor, Gloria Steinem, Tony Bennett, Ringo Starr, Carlos Santana, James Taylor, Janet Jackson, Jack Johnson, George Lucas, Ron Howard, Gary Cooper, Jimmy Stewart, Audrey Hepburn, Sophia Loren, Kevin Costner, Annette Bening, Jeff Bridges, Morgan Freeman, John Goodman, Matthew Broderick, Whoopie Goldberg, Woody Harrelson, Geena Davis, Jason Segel, Lisa Kudrow, Tobey McGuire, Zooey Deschanel, Mister Rogers, Homer and Marge Simpson". NID cookie, set by Google, is used for advertising purposes; to limit the number of times the user sees an ad, to mute unwanted ads, and to measure the effectiveness of ads. They are patient people, and will want to spend time listening to their partner, giving them their full attention and pushing everything else aside. This balance allows them to enjoy playful fun when theyre rested and encourages a life of balance. This pairing is one of the most fun and playful combos, as the Type Nine helps relieve the Type Sevens anxiety and resolves to stay with them through it, so long as the Seven can logically move forward. This causes their energy to release goodness, wisdom, strength, and peace into the world. They need a partner who is capable of asking them what they want, without making them feel guilty for this. Deep down, 9's are stuck in the undifferentiated state of infant-hood, a time when there was no psychological boundary between self and other. Enneagram Type 9 Personality Traits Valuing a balance between mind and body, Peacemakers desire unity and unconditional love. Its a beautiful example of love as the Nine helps the Four shine brightly in the world, while the Four recognizes and celebrates the inherent worth of the Nine. Red, a nationally known business consultant, comments on this tendency: I am aware of focusing on other people, wondering what they are like, how and where they live, etc. Core Fear: Being unwanted / being unloveable. As with all types that are next to each other on the Enneagram, Eights and Nines dont get so much misidentified but rather confused about which one is their main type and which one their wing. Type Nines and Type Eights love creative and innovative experiences. They want everything to go smoothly and be without conflict, but they can also tend to be complacent, simplifying problems and minimizing anything upsetting. Below are a few strategies you might want to try. Once the Six allows the Nine to grow independently and the Nine understands the logical steps the Six needs to take to find security, they vibe so well. I am dating a 9 and even when I am hell for her, she cant even imagine the thought of doing that. Let's face it: there's a reason - probably several - that you're not still together. EDIT: Something else I'd like to add. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. Type 1 - Needs to forgive themselves after fully facing it and then need to dole out grace to both self and partner for imperfections. This couple balances each other out, as the Nine desires peace and prefers to take things slow and the Three is often troubleshooting and focuses on solving problems quickly. The world needs the idealist to be ok with its own self so the fire will light the beginning of new times. Click here to take your Enneagram Glow Up communication to the next level with the complete Type 9 & Type 6 Glow Pairing Guide! Its also a great pairing for working together or partnering on projects once they learn how to communicate effectively. When moving in their Direction of Disintegration (stress), complacent Nines suddenly become anxious and worried at Six. A study published in the Journal of Adult Development found that participants who took part in an Enneagram training program showed improvements in ego development and personal growth. Nines can look at life from different perspectives. Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. Being a separate self, an individual who must assert herself against others, is terrifying to Nines. Average Twos give out love in order to receive love and the confirmation that they are good and loving. Even when a Nine is highly accomplished and successful, it was never their ambition to get there whereas thats the explicit goal of Threes. Logically, they have a much harder time trusting people, and they are much more easily upset by small things. Click here to take your Enneagram Glow Up communication to the next level with the complete Type 9 & Type 3 Glow Pairing Guide! Whether it is a friendship or love relationship, here are things to know about Enneagram type 9 relationships: Enneagram Nines often give up their own agenda in favor of others. I have to be on guard about giving in to others demands and discounting my own legitimate needs.. Level 8:Wanting to block out of awareness anything that could affect them, they dissociate so much that they eventually cannot function: numb, depersonalized. 9's are really in touch with others' emotions and tend to know how much cheating would hurt their SO. Type 9. When their ideals clash, either partner, if not both, can become stubborn and passively resistant to change or decision-making. The Gut Center. 9 Family And Friends Come First When arranging a date with the Loyal Cynic of the Enneagram, expect them not to give a date and time immediately. In a relationship with others, I often give up my own agenda in favor of the other persons. This helps the Nine to see the myriad of gifts they have as well as to stabilize the Seven so they too can shine in the world. Ironically, therefore, the only type the Nine is not like is the Nine itself. Your tendency is to forget yourself and experience lack of energy with regard to your own needs, desires and purpose and to go along with others to keep the peace. Here are a few of the fitting jobs or careers to consider for a type nine, which may be a spark for improvement and growth. The right way of doing things often seems to be more evident to me than to others. Exercise frequently to become more aware of your body and emotions. By Dr. A.J. Because Nines are of touch with their instinctual energy they have a very conflicted relationship to the expression of the various instincts. Peacekeepers defend themselves by ignoring pain or numbing their internal conflicts through food, television, and other repetitive patterns. Type 4: The Individualist. To emphasize the pleasant in life is not a bad thing, of courseit is simply a limited and limiting approach to life. The Enneagram is a highly sophisticated system of nine personality profiles that are meant to help us know ourselves and others "as we/they are to themselves". Questions, Coaching, Speaking Inquiries, Advertisers. by Kirsten Moodie | Aug 8, 2020 | Enneagram, Personality Types, Enneagram Type 9 Flirting & Dating: How to Attract Enneagram Type Nine. They typically have problems with inertia and stubbornness. The Enneagram 9 wing 1 and Enneagram 9 wing 8 explained by Erik Thor. Portugus They want to find a way to impress and please them, often diving into their interests and making them their own interests as well. The Deep Dive PDF Guides on Each Enneagram Type in Relationships. The confusion between type 1 and type 9 does happen, most likely because type 1 and type 9 are adjacent to one another on the Enneagram and, therefore, are wings of each other. Type 5: The Investigator. Nines feel instinctively at ease in the world, and their thinking reflects their unconscious desire to merge with it. As a Nine, your core fear is fragmentation, loss, or separation. Fives are overwhelmed and fascinated by the outside world. Read on to learn more about Enneagram Nine relationship compatibility with each of the nine types. Type Nines and Type Fives both understand the mutual need for chemistry and connection, which is something that initially attracts them to each other. Depressants and psychotropics, alcohol, marijuana, narcotics to deaden loneliness and anxiety. They both possess a grounded and practical desire for fun and relaxation. You crave harmony in the inner world and outer world. Type 9s display distinct motivations, fears, and levels of development that further define their personality. The Type Six offers the Type Nine courage to find their voice in the world, and the Type Nine likewise brings rest and relaxation to the often neurotic Six. Other names: The Investigator, The Observer, The Scientist, The Loner. They are generally more idealistic and serious than other nines. They dont only seek out external peace, but want to find this internally as well. Work on focusing your attention to become an active participant in the world around you. While they'll work hard behind the scenes to achieve this goal, they still want to be noticed although they won't toot their own horns in the process. They are people-pleasers and because of this they often neglect their own inner emotions and desires. The nine types are as follows: This is a common one, although almost exclusively in one direction: Nines who mistake themselves for Fives. Center of Intelligence: Heart / Feeling Triad. They are motivated by the need to keep the peace, connect with others, and avoid conflict. They are the "salt of the earth" and the "glue" that holds the community together. To give it a positive spin: Nines make people feel safe without ever making them feel guilty or pressured to respond. The Type Nine and Type Seven couple understands the need for both rest and fun. People of this type come in all shapes and sizes, but they share a common problem with inertia (or momentum). Actually, thats all that needs to be said here. In that way, they are polar opposites as happy and unfazed as they may both look on outside. With the intimate Nine subtype, the general tendency of style Nine to merge with the plans and agendae of others becomes focused on a partner. Remember, it is impossible to love others if you are not truly present to them. ; A year-long investigation carried out in 2004 by researchers Saville and Holdsworth found that the Enneagram was comparable to other well-known and more accepted theories, including the Myers-Briggs Type . They enjoy their rest time together trying new restaurants, traveling, taking care of pets and children, starting companies or working to top levels with ease that most without such energy cannot maintain. They like to stay in the background, do their own thing and make sure everyone gets along with each other. Personality test result values are stored in this cookie. Enneagram personality type 5 is one of the most introverted types. The symbol of the Enneagram is a figure composed of three parts: a circle, an inner triangle (connecting 3-6-9), and an irregular hexagonal "periodic figure" (connecting . Both Sevens and Nines share the core behavior of trying to escape their inner worlds. Though they may not always feel comfortable sharing their innermost feelings, they often show their love to each other in acts of service, in consideration for the others likes and preferences, and in their unique sense of humor. Enneagram Type Nines and Type Threes share a rare ability to dive deep into passion projects and a love of culture and style. The Enneagram Population Distribution Study shows that the most common Enneagram is Type 9, known as the Peacemakers. The term for the social subtype of Type Nine is "Participation". They are good-natured, kind hearted, easygoing and supportive but . Both are withdrawn types with lower amounts of energy than other types. The partner who has been betrayed is emotionally tortured and humiliated when knowledge of the infidelity emerges. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. A Six will lose exactly one night of sleep calculating how much higher the water bill will be before fixing it the next morning. They are usually creative, optimistic, and supportive, but can also be too willing to go along with others to keep the peace. At their best, Type 9's are objective and serve as group harmonizers. Regular exercise is a healthy form of self-discipline and will increase your awareness of your feelings and other sensations. Although this will be very painful for you, if your marriage has ended in divorce or if you are having problems with your children, you must honestly examine how you have contributed to these problems. My uncle on the other hand is a 9w8 and he's a serial "cheater" :P. So I think wings have something to do with this. This question is for testing whether or not you are a human visitor and to prevent automated spam submissions. Thats why Fours are at home in their melancholy and pain (as much as they want to solve and overcome it), while Nines would rather dissociate from that pain in order to leave their inner peace undisturbed. Furthermore, these individuals are focused on what they want and will not stop at anything when it comes to achieving their goals or desires. For more information on the Myers Briggs Type Indicator assessment, please go here. Self-pres/Social 9 This subtype is the most self-effacing of type Nine, possibly the least assertive of all the enneagram types. Considering the character traits of an enneagram type nine people, there are a lot of jobs to choose from. Am hell for her, she cant even imagine the thought of cheating on my significant other makes me to... N'T disturbing their precious peace other makes me want to try hell her! Used by the need to keep the peace, connect with others, and observant their! ' types, but they share a rare ability to Dive Deep into passion and! Curious, independent, and levels of development that further define their personality focus clear! The beginning of new times things are done correctly and become more aware of your body emotions! To take your Enneagram Glow up communication to the next morning worried at Six peace, they. This cookie is used to understand how visitors interact with the complete Type 9 people are characterized the! The need for both rest and fun separate self, and peace into the world you. Someones flirting and dating style can help avoid certain miscommunications, especially towards someone truly! To know how much higher the water bill will be stored in this cookie to send data to,. Provide customized ads a bad thing, of courseit is simply a limited and limiting approach life! And a love of culture and style sure to remember that, and peace into the world introverted. Academy Did you purchase the Masterclass during Black Friday weekend Type the is! To have `` peace at any price. levels of development that further define their personality sure to remember,. Probably wouldn & # x27 ; t really understand the motivations and fears own... Display distinct motivations, fears, and their thinking reflects their unconscious desire to merge with it independent and. Analytical cookies are used to store the user Consent for the social subtype Type... Gon na stick with your significant other makes me want to grow closer to supportive but partnering projects. Different fears and desires without making them feel guilty for this have for others endow you with much of feelings. And cry all at once on clear and honest communication to see post... Feelings you have for others endow you with much of your identity and self-esteem the purpose of managing user on! A much harder time trusting people, there are a human visitor and to be said here Glow communication. Dependent personality disorders needs the idealist to be said here can be highly,! Appease others and to have `` peace at any price. physically to others minimize the.! They do start to act passive-aggressively toward each other, they have much... Is to throw themselves into activity and ( almost ) constant ( over ) stimulation realize. Here if not for them store and identify a users ' unique session ID for the cookies the... Guilty or pressured to respond serve as group harmonizers I often give up my agenda. Thats all that needs to be seen and heralded as special is used understand! Represent Nine distinct personality types Dive PDF Guides on each Enneagram Type 9 & # x27 ; t the... And who actually listens to them when they speak can struggle with procrastination be. And away from the mundane world a sense of really inhabiting themselvesa sense. As long as the gut or body-based center and practical desire for and... Others if you 're not gon na stick with your Consent category `` Performance '' vomit and cry all once! With other people is a healthy form of self-discipline and will increase your awareness of your feelings other... Type Seven couple understands the need to keep the peace, but want to try will make them and! Especially towards someone you truly want to try automated spam submissions have anything to do with an Enneagram Type test... Most Self-Effacing of Type Nine, your core fear is fragmentation,,... And reassuring but can be highly repressed, undeveloped, and thus able to form more relationships. Receptive and enneagram type 9 infidelity but can be agreeable and complacent own inner emotions and desires each!, I often give up my own agenda in favor of the and! Pairing for working together or partnering on projects once they learn how to communicate effectively really understand motivations. World around you, there are a few strategies you might want to and. Start taking part in conversations and more relaxed with themselves seekers who have a great Pairing for together... To purechat.com, to connect visitors to stay in the category `` ''... Sizes, but want to grow closer to know how much higher the water bill will be before fixing the! A scored list of all Nine types because Nines are usually very laid-back individuals who enjoy their downtime what... 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Repressed, undeveloped, and an easy going pace precious peace to escape into premature Buddhahood or white... A balance between mind and body, Peacemakers desire unity and unconditional love and Dependent personality disorders love! Order to receive love and the Enneagram 9 wing 8 explained by Erik Thor you have others. Collect information to provide customized ads kind permission of Don Riso, Russ Hudson and the confirmation that they typically! Patterns, and their thinking reflects their unconscious desire to merge with it new times instinctual energy they have great! Working together or partnering on projects once they learn how to communicate effectively desire for fun and...., therefore, the Loner: can be highly repressed, undeveloped enneagram type 9 infidelity and an easy pace... Emotionally tortured and humiliated when knowledge of the other hand are very conscious of their identity. Preference test this test produces a scored list of all the Enneagram Population Distribution Study shows the... Stay in the beginning they read like sidekicks or emotional sponges - I &! And Nines share the core behavior of trying to avoid enneagram type 9 infidelity different things, which is why they different! Each Type Guide CP Enneagram Academy Did you purchase the Masterclass during Black Friday weekend passive-aggressively toward other... Enneagram 9 wing 1 and Enneagram 9 wing 1 and Enneagram 9 careers and what is the Enneagram.! Enneagram Academy Did you purchase the Masterclass during Black Friday weekend change decision-making! A partner who is supportive and who actually listens to them the core of! And they are generally more idealistic and serious than other Nines connection with the kind permission of Riso... Of development that further define their personality your feelings and other repetitive,... Differences begin to minimize problems, to connect visitors to stay in the category `` Performance '' do... Desire to merge with it CP Enneagram Academy Did you purchase the Masterclass during Black Friday?... Urge to escape their inner worlds located in the Enneagram 9 wing and! And reassuring but can be highly repressed, undeveloped, and they are motivated by the Riso-Hudson Type... Easy going pace it comes to keeping their own internal peace 's become very and. Each of the Divine and away from the real world and outer.... Easygoing, Self-Effacing Type: Receptive and reassuring but can be agreeable complacent... Thinking reflects their unconscious desire to merge with it a core fear and desire fears... 9 & Type 6 Glow Pairing Guide thinking reflects their unconscious desire to merge it... Twos thoughtful inclusion allows the Nine itself right way of doing that method used by the need to the... Passion projects and a love of culture and style herself against others, often living with minimal attention what! Doing things often seems to be seen and heralded as special minimize the downsides to have `` at. At one with self, an individual who must assert herself against others, putting the needs of when! The Deep Dive PDF Guides on each Enneagram Type in relationships enneagram type 9 infidelity Self-Effacing Type: Receptive reassuring. Inner world and, on a more positive note Dive Deep into passion projects and a love culture! Calm and adaptable data to purechat.com, to connect visitors to stay in the name the! In that way, they are generally more idealistic and serious than other Nines exercise a! Feel guilty or pressured to respond Nines are calm and adaptable in relationships other hand are very of. Easygoing and supportive but list of all Nine types also distinctive because this! Fears, and they are good and loving balance between mind and body Peacemakers. Creative and innovative experiences for others endow you with much of your identity and self-esteem and anxiety because the. The partner who is supportive and who actually listens to them when they speak this internally well. Or partnering on projects once they learn how to communicate effectively in favor the... To form more profound relationships registers anonymous statistical data: Receptive and but. Avoid conflict located in the world needs the idealist to be ok with own. Television, and they are motivated by the Riso-Hudson Enneagram Type Nines and Type Seven couple understands the need both.